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THE CRUnCH OF THE CROTcHES IN CAIrO aka it sucks - WELCOME TO SANDY HELL [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
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THE CRUnCH OF THE CROTcHES IN CAIrO aka it sucks [Sep. 2nd, 2007|12:32 pm]
cairocandy
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[Current Location |North Africa]
[mood |blankblank]
[music |Dexters Lab in Arabic]

Day by day, one would think, any life would become routine-or, just adjusted. I am maladapted-or in one day the following happened-which include two police incidents, bazaar/bizarre perverts, total loss of car brakes and a true riddle.

First the riddle,out of three siblings-two of the siblings marry two brothers, another someone else. The children of the two siblings who married brothers marry-their son marries the child of the original younger third sibling. How are they related-if someone knows about first cousin marriages-when "doubled"-well, what is the familial relation? I know there must be a name for this-by the way, these are some of my in-laws-I am just attempting to find the correct name....any ideas?

So, it is not actually a riddle, as there is no clever answer. The differing generations can marrry due to wide spread age differences in original group of eight-???????

THE BIZARRE BAZAAR-Khan Khalidi (sp?) is the world's oldest bazaar-a real treat with a slightly sleazy circus atmosphere-and a major tourist spot...anyway, we shop there and smoke shisha in its little alley way cafes. On the way there, with two children, a very heavy uncle's wife in full nijab (face covering) and a very nice aunt, and a cousin driving his very own taxi-the brakes fail-completely fail-in Cairo traffic.

We crash-by sheer luck and the grace of God-into only two other taxis-missing all tourists, buses and trucks. So, the tourist police are "nice" as I am not covered and look(and am) American (read dollars)-we pay off the appropriate people and the children and women leave without any adult males escort.

Had we been at the bazaar, even though it was a Friday-we would have been okay-unfortunately, we cross over into the Attaba-a very packed locals-only area which sells very cheap goods. No tourist police. In fact, no military police. I am not covered. I am about five inches taller than most women here-we are attempting to follow in a flesh-on-flesh crowd-a short heavy woman in full nijab-with no purse to distinguish her from the hundreds of other short heavy women in black nijab-in the crowd, we can't identify her by her shoes-as we can not see them. Impossible.

My son is with the one aunt. He is instructed to elbow and push away anyone as able-which he does quite well. She appears to have a good hold on him. I have my little girl in front of me-standing out as the only-and I saw no non-locals at all-woman Amerika, I am pushed against from behind by the most repulsive of guys-in galabayas (long shirt-like garments to ground)-they consider me free-picking and, worse, there is no adult male escort. I scream at them in Arabic, and they press their pelvis against me-one grabs my boob-so-to everyone's amusement I scream in Arabic, "If you touch my boob, I will slit your throat." I get lost with my daughter. We literally have to fight our way through the crowd. The women, I elbow. The men I curse-then they back off.Mostly. At that point, one crotch cruncher was just like another.

At any rate we finally reach the end of the Attaba and find the black figure we were attempting to follow-my son elbows a big kid who gets him and then my daughter whacks the kid with a water bottle-okay, nobody touched her-so, we win. We all pile into a taxi-the cousin (taxi/breaks)is still somewhere else.

In the taxi, the nijaba (woman wearing nijab) gets a call. Her daughter has just been taken by the police in their village after a physical fight after exiting the bus-apparently with two Christian girls. At any rate, nobody is arrested, but the girls are all a bit banged up. Nijaba goes into a screaming rage-in Arabic-about the Christians in general-including stripping them naked, hanging them from trees and whipping them. She lets forth a string of curses so vile that the cab driver puts on a tape of the Quran. OKAY. The back and forth calls and the screaming cursing hysteria are just too much.

At my mother-in-law's house, after continued arguing, screaming and general chaos-my mother-in-law becomes ill. I promtly pass out into an escape sleep.

Before we leave, I am told my clothing is too tight and a cousin is looking at my ass-really! Disgusting! In my defense, I am wearing long jeans and two shirts for modesty-Oh, and a baseball cap-which rather-how stupid of me-reads "American Eagle".

Oh, then they seriously discuss the obvious rumor that the president of Egypt is dead-later that night-the president states he is not ill-or dead.(This is true-please look at Egypt news AP articles for Friday.)

Sometimes, well, some days here are just quite trying.....over and out...Sandy in Sodom
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